A testimony of an Indonesian Muslim girl who just converted to Hindu

Discussion in 'Conversion Stories' started by Aum, Mar 29, 2015.

  1. Aum

    Aum New Member

    I'll start with the story when I was a young girl who is very arrogant. In Madura, Islamic religious education inculcated since children are still very small, consistent, radical and tight. For several years, every afternoon I take education in one of the Islamic schools based Muhammadiyah conservative. Such intensive education was already shaping the mindset that I was a lucky kid, born in Muslim families, Islamic automatically, definitely go to heaven someday. This arrogance is never spoken up, but I must admit that this heart was overwhelmed by it.
    When I returned home for college, it increasingly becomes vanity. Example, each saw chinnese girls with a cross on her necklace, I cursed to myself, " so Pretty but will go to hell as well". See nuns or monks, for me all they do is useless. Furthermore according to the Balinese people, I'm sure all balinese will go to hell. The great man, a hero, a social activist, if pagan to me they just undead. There in vain if the practice of a person without faith in God (I forgot suras and verse). Is there defense? No. Prophet's uncle, Abu Talib, who was desperately keeping safety at the beginning of the preaching of the Prophet, has promised to hell for not following the Prophet's call to faith in God.
    Meanwhile, in Surabaya I was involved with another side of life. I mingled in the transgender community, prostitutes, thuggery to drug trafficking. Black world turned out to open my mindset. Early 2008, I pulled away and began to brood a lot. From this experience I attest, not all Muslims are good and not all good people are muslim. I choked when I heard my heart saying, "You are so arrogant, Gentha. You are not ashamed? "
    Instantly, my mind growing everywhere. I began to asking the nature of existence of human life, about the fate, of the God who called the Compassionate, the nature of God as the Lord of the Worlds, about justice, about the nature of conscience who supposedly never lies, about truth claims, and a multitude of other questions. However, there is most disturbing, "what about the good people who are not Muslims? What if they were not born in an Islamic environment, know about the existence of Islam, but had been satisfied with their own religion and died as a non-Muslim? God has created the world's plural, why only Muslims are saved? So for what they all created? What the world just to meet and burn in hell in the end? Does not that make humans become mere toys for Him? "
    Increasingly, my brain filled with questions unstoppable. The guidance of Allah suddenly seemed ambiguous. I think can not hope to God for the safety of my life and the people around the world. Expect the guidance of Allah is like hoping our name appears on the side of the dice is thrown. I know, there is a story about a Jewish prostitute who go to heaven for giving a thirsty dog a drink. Why "quota" Jewish whore is not given only to Abu Talib, the Prophet's uncle faithful? Do not know.

    I was disappointed. God was not wise as I imagined. One day I was surprised to see a car with a short verse from the Koran written large in the glass behind him, "And whoever seeks a religion other than Islam, it will not be accepted that religion, and in the Hereafter he included a group that received a painful punishment" (Qur'an Ali-Imran: 85). I, who for many years as a favorite students of the teachers in school, just realized another perspective of the verses that I have read throughout life, it turns out these verses are not oriented to reality. Is not every Islam are good and not all good ppl are muslim?
    Since the day, I am more convinced there was something wrong with the grip of my life. My brain is filled with rebellion and disappointment. Finally I understand, I need to figure of God who can protect all people, all beings. I need a doctrine that respects all aspects of human nature as a spiritual being without descriminate it just because he kafir or no religion.

    I started locking myself. I have not the slightest idea of letting my outside intervene. I did not even tell or ask the opinion of others. I am trying to find an answer from the point of view of non-partisanship. I am trying to find justification in Islam. I learned a lot of religious teachings. I browse the internet every night.
    Unfortunately, the middle of the month of Ramadan in 2008, I was not helped. Faith me trigger collapse before I could get the answer I was looking for. I was crying uncontrollably till could not stand up. I screamed to myself, "God, help me! I know you exist, but I do not know how to look for your truth! "For days I was struggling with a laptop while occasionally sobbing until I found" Hinduism-Wikipedia ". In one of his website written a sloka, sloka from the Bhagavad Gita that has changed my life until this day. the Sloka said, "I have never envied and always be fair to all beings. For me no one most hate and the no most I love. But as devoted to me, he was on me and I will with him anytime "( IX.29 Bhagavad Gita). Instantly, there is a creeping cold sensation pervading my deepest recesses of the heart. This is what I looking for all unanswered questions that almost made me become addicted to sleeping pills. He who calls himself as I AM here, he was the one that I believe to bring the truth to all people, all beings in the entire universe. He is everything. He has taught me and all people about what is love. He managed to answer my questions one by one.

    Ida Sang Hyang Wasa Widhi, Krishna, Brahma, Vishnu, Siva, and so on. The names refer to the One Who is Single. Ekam sad viprah bhahuda vadanti. He just great with his omniscience of power infinite. Pure, essential, covering everything and never take sides. He does not teach a single way to worship Him. And most importantly, he recognizes the spiritual aspects of human existence that are naturally connected with him, without the fragmented frame is called religion. In this context I call it Atma.
    Friends, this is my meeting with the Sanatana Dharma. without dream of meeting Shri Krishna. But life will change anyone who understand his teachings. No religion is the same, but the love of God that belongs to everyone. Sanatana Dharma recognizes it. And the people who love the Lord, will not commit violence against fellow human beings. Look of the Sufis, they ignore the hostility towards the unbelievers and promote compassion. Finally, addressing the phenomenon of conversion that often befall Hindus, I want to notice to you that maybe this time began to lose faith in Sanatana Dharma and middle weigh to 'try' another religion. It may be true, Sanatana Dharma is so complex, make us do not know enough about our own religion. But, consider the experience encouraged me to apostasy that I have discussed earlier in this note. All the Hebrews contains the essence of religion is the same. Indeed, in my opinion, no one, who has received Islamic education, or Christian, or Christian, or Jewish, are not happiness
    has exclusive feeling in his heart, a little or a lot. If only you know what's out there, Do you still interested leave your home, Sanatana Dharma
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